A few Thoughts about People and the Internet

[puppetmaker]

Peter and I have been catching up on the episodes of “House” that we have on our DVR (How did we deal with the problem of too many shows at one time before DVR?) and the last one we saw was about this young lady who put all her life out on the Internet for all to read. She was played by Laura Prepon from That 70s Show fame who really needs more work or a new series because she is just that good. There was the usual misdiagnose before the real problem appears. (I swear they could have a show based on all the malpractice suits that must be filed against House for all the mistakes before they come up with the real problem.)

At one point one of the doctor’s comes into the room and Frankie and an Internet buddy are sitting there with their laptops open looking at their computers. They aren’t talking to each other but the young lady sitting on the chair is reading what Frankie is typing from the hospital bed. The lady even says, I have to go but I’ll comment later. This just makes no sense to the doctor but I know that this sort of behavior goes on all the time. I have seen it in action. Also Frankie consults her Internet readers about what she should do at one point in the story and her boyfriend is horrified because the answer will affect no one but them.

People like Frankie exist on the Internet and are becoming more prevalent. Some Internet bloggers seems to live only if they have so many readers/followers. (I swear it is worse with tweeting and facebook.) And some create situations to keep people reading or say things that they might not say except it’s the Internet so it is OK because no one will really be able to find them (which is not true). The idea of polling the mob to figure out what to do in one’s life is not that far out there these days. I have seen people consult groups of people they barely know about haircuts, hair color, clothing choices and, rather scary to me, tattoos and they take the advise from total strangers.

Recently I had yet another encounter with one of my least favorite Internet citizens. This person needs a serious clue by four as to how asinine they sound on the Internet and that they have a bad habit of beating a dead horse until everyone walks away is disgust and then declares victory because everyone stopped arguing with her. “Arguing” includes giving them anything that is contrary to how they say the world is run or should be run by their standards. If really pushed into the corner by someone who is new to the group and trying to really be helpful, they pull out a list of reasons why they can’t really listen to this because they have all these health problems compounded with various social anxiety disorders that they know they have because they read the symptoms on the Internet. When really pushed on it, everyone is being mean to them and they know what is wrong so why should they see a Doctor? Now they are hiding behind that stupid idea of “fail” because they don’t agree with others in the group. So I am just ignoring the thread they are on which is sad because there was some other good discussion going on within the group but my mental health is more important than the Internet.

I think it would be easier if people like that could be dismissed as a troll but I know they are not. They sincerely believe what they are spouting. I honestly wonder if they would be able to say it to the faces of the people they are putting down in real life or because of the ease in which people seem to be able to say whatever is on their mind, they can only say that sort of stuff on the Internet. There was a guy who on the Internet disagreed with Peter and had the stones to talk to Peter at a convention and, according to Peter, make his argument very rationally. They shook hands and agreed that that was a topic they would never agree upon. That guy is in the minority. He is willing to talk about what he believes both on and off the Internet.

I am too. Those who have met me, or knew me before the Internet revolution, will tell you that what I write here or anywhere else is something I would say in person. I am pretty much like my writings. Maybe I am a little more polished and well thought out on this blog but I can take more time to mull through things that in conversation I have to say at the moment. But the beliefs I say here are the beliefs I carry around with me. I believe myself to be an honest person and try to live an honest life both here and in the world around me. I just wish more people would do the same rather than having that odd Internet persona and then how they are in the real world.

I am grateful to the honest.

Comments

[wookieegunner.livejournal.com]

A long time ago I heard a rule about the Internet that I have yet to see anyone refrute. It is called the Fist-Face Syndrome. You see all social conventions boil down to one thing, keeping my fist out of your face. Now the problem with the Internet is that as virtual people, I can never put my fist in your face so the social conventions that would be built never have a reason to happen.

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

I hadn't thought of it that way, but I think you are onto something there.

[ginasketch.livejournal.com]

I am honest, but I don't make most of my posts public as in my experience, the outside world doesn't seem to value my honesty. Having strong opinions= wrong somehow.

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

And that is sad. I do value honesty even when I might not agree with the position that is being espoused. Cause I can say, "Well at least they were being honest."

But you are right. There is this cookie cutter mentality in society today that shouts down different from them which is not a good thing if you ask me.

[millysdaughter.livejournal.com]

There is a sign in the hallway at my school: "It is better to be hated for what you ARE than to be loved for what you are NOT."

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

I like that a lot! Needs to be out on the Internet more.

[beldar.livejournal.com]

Interesting the personalities the Internet brings out. I've got a "frenemy" (I know it's a cliche-in-the-making, but I can't think of a better word that fits) who I got on the bad side of last year. The offline world would notice nothing at all, but she is prolific to say the least online.

I do try to keep in mind what I "say" here and in other venues. Though it doesn't live up to the standard, I often think, would I say this in public? and more often, what if this were the last entry I made here, is that the impression I want to leave?

And re: House, I know I wouldn't like to be his patient (unless I *really* had no other option other than dying) as I'd be stuck with the bill for a lot of tests (many later proven unnecessary), and I don't know if I'm up to the kidney, then liver, then heart, then etc. failure one has to go through before he has the "a-ha" moment.

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

what if this were the last entry I made here, is that the impression I want to leave?

That is something to think about. Wish more people would.

On another topic: love love love the Icon.

[querldox.livejournal.com]

Seem to recall early episodes of House relatively frequently making the point that House was by far the most sued employee of Princeton-Plainsboro, and that Cuddy's pretty much the only person who'd hire him/keep him employed due to that.

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

Did they? It was so long ago but then he also had a drug problem that would have gotten most medical licenses yanked long ago.

I'll suspend my disbelief but I think it would be an interesting law show.

[dungeonwriter.livejournal.com]

Actually, your blog has done the opposite. I've become much more careful about what I say about real people because of this blog and a few others, because I now wonder if you or some of the other authors on my f-list know them and I want to mind my manners!

The internet gives you this feeling that "they" will never know. You don't have to take personal responsibility for it, you can hide behind an internet handle and well, if you screw it up, you can always find a new one. I'm very conscious this this...this is me. I've met people in real life as dungeonwriter so if I screw it up, it's all over for me on the internet.

Maybe that's the solution? See the internet as just another part of your entire identity and not some costume you can hide behind.

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

See the internet as just another part of your entire identity and not some costume you can hide behind.

I think that is a brilliant idea. I really do.

I guess I am a little more of a public figure than a majority of the Internet just because of who I know. But even before Peter and I got together, I was pretty careful about what I said just cause that was how my Mama raised me.

[popfiend.livejournal.com]

Those who have met me, or knew me before the Internet revolution, will tell you that what I write here or anywhere else is something I would say in person. I am pretty much like my writings. Maybe I am a little more polished and well thought out on this blog but I can take more time to mull through things that in conversation I have to say at the moment. But the beliefs I say here are the beliefs I carry around with me. I believe myself to be an honest person and try to live an honest life both here and in the world around me. I just wish more people would do the same rather than having that odd Internet persona and then how they are in the real world.

This is very true.

And I work very hard to make sure that I'm doing the same. Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn't, but it's always me and it's always real.

*hug*

Thank you for sharing yourself with us here.

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

*hugs* you too my friend.

You are a very honest person and I am proud to call you friend.

[trinalin.livejournal.com]

The Internet has always been a place for me to express myself, I'm just more gregarious online than in person. With complete strangers IRL (or people I barely know), I am extraordinarily shy. Once I know people well in person, I am quite garrulous. Online, I'll be garrulous to complete strangers. But the opinions of trinalin the online persona and trinalin the real life weirdo are the same. :-)

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

You keep a consistency by doing this which many don't. They have their on-line persona and their RL persona.

I figure that you and I would get along like a house on fire off line since we get along so well online.

[barbarienne.livejournal.com]

The funniest comparison I've gotten between the way I come across on the internet and the way I am in person is that I seem more serious on the internet. I suppose that's true; writing thoughtfully can sound that way.

I'll take that, though. I expect it's much better to meet in real life and have people decide I'm more entertaining in person than they were expecting.


I classify Trolls into 4 categories. Your unintentional troll is a category-1 troll. Sometimes they're just new to the internet and don't understand how people interact here, or how they're coming across; these sort are usually educable.

Category-2 trolls are the sort of person you're describing above. They come across as assholes, and they don't care. They may or may not present excuses for their deliberate choice to continue acting in this manner. There's not a lot to be done with this sort except to fall back on my #1 rule of life: "Don't engage with the crazy people." Alas, others will continue to engage with them, thereby feeding their trollish egos. This is where filters become useful.

The one thing that always destroys trolls is making fun of them. The problem with that is it requires time and effort. In my younger days, that was entertaining for me. Now I'm older and busier, and don't want to be bothered exerting my creativity against the hydra.

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

I think that I am over de-trolling unless I have to. I am the moderator for one LJ community and that's enough for me. It is not a high drama area but has enough that I have to deal with.

[miintikwa.livejournal.com]

I am always grateful for the people who are the same online and off. :)

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

Me too. And I can attest that you are one of those people having met you.

[miintikwa.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I try to be genuine here, but sometimes I worry that I'm failing, or not doing well enough. It is heartening to know I'm succeeding! :)

[ladytalker13.livejournal.com]

I try to remember that there is a real person on the other end of the post, and type accordingly... if I wouldn't say something to their face, I try not to say it online...

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

That's a good rule of thumb.