LJ Idol Week 15: Young Zombies in Love (Final Version)

[puppetmaker]

Lisa was half out of her mind with worry, probably because fifty percent of her brain was missing: apparent a tasty snack for a passing undead. Fortunately the mystical energy that allowed her reanimated corpse to shamble also gave her the ability to string a few thoughts together and have them stick. She felt pretty much how she used to feel when she was alive but before she had her first cup of coffee. Things tended to slip away...things such as thoughts and random feelings and, most noticeably, body parts, as her walking cadaver slowly rotted since it was no longer pumping blood.

She had a few regrets. For starters, there was that stupid move to get a pack of cigarettes (because she just had to have a smoke) after being warned not to leave her house because of possible packs of roving zombies. She had made it to the corner shop only to find that it had been vandalized and most everything had been taken. Digging through the rubble had uncovered a crushed soft-pack of menthol lights. She hated menthol cigarettes but the craving for a smoke was so powerful that she grabbed the pack, plus a few bags of snack food, and headed back to her house...only to encounter a pack of zombies, which she had thought she could outrun but sadly turned out to be mistaken.

Another regret was that she never had a boyfriend. Oh, she had been pretty enough when she was alive, but always seemed to be the second choice on the menu. She asked her more popular friends how to dress or do extreme party make-up. No matter how dramatic a look she went for, she always seemed to fade into the woodwork. Now her new zombie status could only lessen the odds of her finding that perfect guy.

She shambled across the local park. The moonlight painted the world silver around her. She would have looked up at the moon, but she was concerned that more of her brain would slip out of her skull and she wanted to keep what she had left. A mind, after all, was a terrible thing to waste.

What a beautiful magical night, she thought, and here I have no one to share it with. She continued to shuffle through a small grove of trees when her right foot encountered something in the leaves. She moved the bed of leave carefully with her hands and found a body.

If her heart had still been providing beats, it would have skipped one. She looked upon the most handsome man, living or dead, she had ever seen. He had long, raven-black hair that was spread out on the cold ground. The face could have been sculpted by Michelangelo with its straight nose and pouty lips combined with cheek bones to die for (if she were not already dead) and a chin that could cut glass. The body was naked so she could see every detail of its perfect pecs, chiseled abs, and...ample...equipment. The legs and arms just added to the loveliness of the picture.

She felt something stir in her nether regions, which surprised her somewhat since she had assumed she was dead all over.
Then the naked man's eyes snapped open revealing the bluest eyes she had ever seen. She felt herself take in a breath that she no longer needed and then let it out. The godlike man slowly got to his feet and looked around. He opened his mouth and said, "Unnnnnnnnn" which in Zombie meant, "What the heck?"

She felt a shiver and thought how impressive it was that he didn't swear. "UnnnNNnnnnn" she replied, which in Zombie translated as, "You are a Zombie now. One of the undead."

"Unnnnnn" he said ("Really? That is so cool.")

"UnnnUnnnn?" she moaned ("You think this is cool?")

"UnnnnnnNNNNNnnnnn" he groaned ("Yeah, I was going to be dead from cancer soon so I think this is a better option if you ask me.")

"Unn." She said ("I guess so.")

The man managed a smile and said, "Uuuuunnnnn" ("You're cute.")

She tried to smile but could only manage half of one, plus a bit of a blush which was all the more impressive since there was no longer any blood pumping through her veins.

The man seemed lost in thought for a bit and then what could pass for a concerned look appeared on his face, "UnUnUnnnnnnnnn?" ("Did you kill me?")

"UmmmmUUUUUNNNNNnnn," she said with an alarmed shriek. ("No! No! I didn't. I just found you out here covered in leaves.")

He looked down at his state of undress, "UhhhhhhhhhhUnnnnnnn" ("Where are my clothes?")

She found herself blushing again (or what passed for blushing for a zombie.)

He tried to cock an eyebrow but failed, "Uhhhhhhmmmmmm" ("You rescued me! Therefore I must kiss you!")

He grabbed her up in his strong arms and planted his lips upon hers. She could feel herself melting into the embrace. His slightly rough beard stubble scratched against her skin but she didn't mind. She was lost in the throes of passion, as was he. And most amazing was that his member came to attention while there was no blood pumping in his veins.

They tore off what was left of her clothes and fell to the ground with many grunts and groans. She could feel herself let go for the first time. What did it matter? She was dead so nothing worse could really happen.

He kneaded her ample breasts and licked her cold nipples. She found that the stirring in her nether regions was getting stronger. She wanted him as she had never wanted a man before. He was like fire to her, and she a moth. She knew it was dangerous but she just wanted more and more. The moans and groans continued, but rather than words they were instead expressions of their passion. As he thrust into her, he encountered slight resistance, but his throbbing zombie-hood would not be denied. Their dislocated hips ground together lustily, and then the strangest thing began to happen. As he kissed her harder and harder and she him, their lips sloughed off and they found themselves grinding not only hips, but teeth. The friction of their lovemaking was causing their skin to rip and tear. Her breasts fell off but she didn't care. She just wanted him. She gripped harder onto his un-pulsing member and, as he pulled back to thrust, not all of him made it out. But he continued to go off half-cocked, pounding her into oblivion. And the last thought she could hold together before she totally fell apart was,So this was it is like to be screwed to death. I could live with this.

Comments

[jenny_evergreen]

*applause*

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

Thank you! Thank You! I'll be here all week. Try the veal. *grin*

[chite.livejournal.com]

Really funny and disturbing at the same time.

I'm so glad other people find zombies to be funny :)

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

It was a bit of a tightrope to write. I wanted to not get it too gross but just to the edge of "oh no, she isn't going THERE is she?"

[lilmissmagic71.livejournal.com]

'throbbing zombie-hood'

*ded from laughing*

Love this!

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

Thank you. It was fun to write and then rewrite a couple of times to get it to where I wanted it.

[jennieknits.livejournal.com]

I'm dying over here. The image of screwing to death will now always be embedded in my mind.

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

My work here is done *takes a bow* *grin*

[elva-undine.livejournal.com]

I love the dialogue translations.
"Yeah, I was going to be dead from cancer soon so I think this is a better option if you ask me."
"I guess so."

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I figure that if you have a dead sentence as it were, Zombie doesn't seem a bad option.

[fidget]

I...well, I honestly have no words for this post. It was well-written, but...yuck. Graphic zombie sex.

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

Sorry. I guess I should have put up a graphic warning on this one.

[minikin.livejournal.com]

Hehee

"nether regions"

And all the translated groans.

I love it!

[puppetmaker40.livejournal.com]

Thank you. It was fun to write. The polish took a little longer to get it right. I have th earlier version up as well as my alternative entry for My Greatest Challenge.