![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
The Topic for the week:
Whose LJ is it anyway? Balancing personal expression and friends-list sensibilities in determining content.
Which I am putting behind a cut to save my friends list.
This is a topic I have been thinking about for a while now for a number of reasons. I have a pretty extensive list of people that I keep up with via their web log and they keep up with me through mine.
I started by web log to keep my parents and close friends apprised of what I was up to and what Caroline was doing since she was changing from day to day. The place where my original web log was and still is runs off my husband's site. He started his web log while I was still pregnant with Caroline. He even had a contest for the readers as to when she would be born and how much she would weigh and her gender (which we did not know beforehand).
I knew early on that my web log was going to be read by people I have never met or only knew from my encounters with them on the Internet. Because of my husband's regular column in Comic Buyers Guide, I had gotten use to the fact that people remember things he wrote about that concerned our lives. And I knew what I wrote would also be remembered by people that I might met at a convention or other social situations. So I have always been a self-censor while typing things that go out into the Internet. I know that whatever I put here could come back and bite me on the rump.
I got on Live Journal because my younger sister (my only sister) had one and it was an easy way to keep up with her. I found out that other friends were here as well and pretty soon I had a friends list made up of people I knew. Then I started adding friends of friends that I liked to read. And friends of friends added me to their list. I have never hid who I was and who I was married to nor did I make a big deal about it. And eventually some people who were fans of his added me usually after asking me it was OK. I added people I met in communities that I enjoyed reading and it blossomed from there.
Now I had hit a point where I had quite a number of people reading me that I didn't know. And I made a decision to put a couple of layers on my live journal. I don't have too many entries that are friends only. A lot of those are memes that I just want to share with people who have taken the time to add me to their reading list. But there is not much I have put out here that I don't mind that others know. I do have a private list for things that I need to put out of my head. I also have a paper journal that I use for my "brain dumps".
Things I try to avoid are profanity (I tend to use slang or fake words), offending the various religions of the people who read this (which can be walking a tightrope), and politics (because I have seen what it does to my husband's board). But those who know me probably have a pretty good feel where I stand on things. Most people know I am an ardent defender of the 1st amendment along with my husband. They know that I am an old school Whovian along with a number of other fandoms. People know my love of puppetry and doll making and costuming.
I have adjusted to being a rather public person. I can even speak to a large group and not feel uncomfortable which was not always true. I look at my web log as speaking to a large group of people and adjust what I say accordingly. So it's my spot on the web and I'll say what I want to. I don't force anyone to read it nor do I get upset if someone decides that my web log is not their cuppa and so far that has worked well for me.
Whose LJ is it anyway? Balancing personal expression and friends-list sensibilities in determining content.
Which I am putting behind a cut to save my friends list.
This is a topic I have been thinking about for a while now for a number of reasons. I have a pretty extensive list of people that I keep up with via their web log and they keep up with me through mine.
I started by web log to keep my parents and close friends apprised of what I was up to and what Caroline was doing since she was changing from day to day. The place where my original web log was and still is runs off my husband's site. He started his web log while I was still pregnant with Caroline. He even had a contest for the readers as to when she would be born and how much she would weigh and her gender (which we did not know beforehand).
I knew early on that my web log was going to be read by people I have never met or only knew from my encounters with them on the Internet. Because of my husband's regular column in Comic Buyers Guide, I had gotten use to the fact that people remember things he wrote about that concerned our lives. And I knew what I wrote would also be remembered by people that I might met at a convention or other social situations. So I have always been a self-censor while typing things that go out into the Internet. I know that whatever I put here could come back and bite me on the rump.
I got on Live Journal because my younger sister (my only sister) had one and it was an easy way to keep up with her. I found out that other friends were here as well and pretty soon I had a friends list made up of people I knew. Then I started adding friends of friends that I liked to read. And friends of friends added me to their list. I have never hid who I was and who I was married to nor did I make a big deal about it. And eventually some people who were fans of his added me usually after asking me it was OK. I added people I met in communities that I enjoyed reading and it blossomed from there.
Now I had hit a point where I had quite a number of people reading me that I didn't know. And I made a decision to put a couple of layers on my live journal. I don't have too many entries that are friends only. A lot of those are memes that I just want to share with people who have taken the time to add me to their reading list. But there is not much I have put out here that I don't mind that others know. I do have a private list for things that I need to put out of my head. I also have a paper journal that I use for my "brain dumps".
Things I try to avoid are profanity (I tend to use slang or fake words), offending the various religions of the people who read this (which can be walking a tightrope), and politics (because I have seen what it does to my husband's board). But those who know me probably have a pretty good feel where I stand on things. Most people know I am an ardent defender of the 1st amendment along with my husband. They know that I am an old school Whovian along with a number of other fandoms. People know my love of puppetry and doll making and costuming.
I have adjusted to being a rather public person. I can even speak to a large group and not feel uncomfortable which was not always true. I look at my web log as speaking to a large group of people and adjust what I say accordingly. So it's my spot on the web and I'll say what I want to. I don't force anyone to read it nor do I get upset if someone decides that my web log is not their cuppa and so far that has worked well for me.
no subject
Date: 2008-01-15 03:32 am (UTC)(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2008-01-15 05:02 am (UTC)And, it's time for bed.
~cheers~
(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2008-01-15 11:08 am (UTC)The 'only' filter I have is "friends only". I'll never refer to anything to do with Laura or the divorce in an open entry, and only rarely in friends locked. That's not what my blog is for - if I need to whinge at all, I'll do that to friends, not online.
I'll rarely talk about work, and even then, it'll almost always be under a friends lock.
A friend once said that I'll answer almost any personal question (in real life if not online) but getting me to volunteer anything is like getting blood from a stone; he may have a point.
Like you, I'm not a fan of swearing, and since my son sometimes reads my blog, (but doesn't click - as far as I know anyway - on the friends link) I ask that people moderate their language in their replies to public entries on my blog.
(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2008-01-15 12:04 pm (UTC)(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2008-01-15 03:23 pm (UTC)-Your own words being turned against you.
-TMI (too much information).
-Strangers as friends.
-Identity theft.
All reasons I leave my posts public (with very few friends only) choosing to instead censor myself. Reasons I don't discuss my family or work. Reasons I don't discuss my medical conditions that I don't want people knowing about. Reasons I don't post personal information in memes that could be passwords or application forms' data.
To be honest, I'm shocked anyone includes me in any form of an inner circle on LJ. I'm flattered and I'm not asking you to disown me or anything, just stating I am shocked.
(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2008-01-16 12:38 am (UTC)(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2008-01-16 12:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-16 02:23 am (UTC)I really enjoyed reading it and I avoid politics as well even though it's one of my passions.
no subject
Date: 2008-01-16 02:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-16 03:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-16 05:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-16 08:22 pm (UTC)Thanks for sharing.
The only filter I have is the "friends only" tag, and that's mostly to hide my work stuff and things that may not be appropriate for younger viewers.
I figured if I was going to be out here, I was going to be out here. On some level, I found it safer. Also, it allows me to form better connections with people like yourself.
BTW, I'm hoping we get to meet up this July at the event of the century. :)
Thanks for letting me in.
*HUG*
no subject
Date: 2008-01-16 09:40 pm (UTC)I switched to "friends only" because someone was trolling a number of my friends at one point. I wanted them to feel safe somewhere -- hence, my journal.
I also try not to swear or write anything too inflammatory. I learned the hard way how words can return and bite you *sigh*
no subject
Date: 2008-01-17 03:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-17 07:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-17 11:17 pm (UTC)KilljoyKilroy was here (http://n-decisive.livejournal.com/207506.html).Well done
Date: 2008-01-18 06:47 am (UTC)