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(Say it in an Irish accent and it’ll make more sense)
I had a friend who passed away last year by the name of Marty Gear. Marty was well known in convention costuming circles for a number of things including his beloved vampire Uncle Vlad who MC’d many a costume call. When things slowed down or there was need for filler, Uncle Vlad would always tell a joke and over the year, on purpose, these jokes got worse and worse. Marty collected bad vampire jokes like some people collect comics or baseball cards. He took great pride in his collection too.
The last time I saw him at a convention, he ran a bunch of new ones he had gathered up from when we last met. He knew that if he could get me to groan and roll my eyes, he had a serious winner. There would be a glint of glee in his eye when he knew he had one that would get me.
What does a Vampire call a squad of cheerleaders? A Happy Meal
He could also tell a shaggy dog story with the best of them. A shaggy dog story is a joke that takes a while to get to the punch line and usually the punch line is pretty groan inducing.
The skill that Marty had was when to tell these awful jokes for maximum effect. MCing a masquerade is hard. You have to keep it moving, keep the audience in a positive mood, and fill the gaps. The people who are better as it make it so the audience thinks, “well that was a fast masquerade” only to find out that they had been sitting there for two hours. When they are constantly looking at their watch, you know that you have a problem. Marty could take the “feel” of the audience pretty quickly and tailor his shtick accordingly. The more often he was the MC of a call, the easier it was for him. He knew what had worked and not worked the year before. It is a gift that many do not have.
I miss my friend. I miss being the test subject to some really groan inducing jokes. I miss watching him tell some of these jokes to a wider audience and getting a mix of laughter and groans. I miss the mastery he had of MCing a contest.
Good night Uncle Vlad.
Marty Gear as Uncle Vlad
(For the VI: This is a picture of Marty in his full vampire get up. Behind him is a doorframe with some cobwebs on it to the right of the doorframe is a large wall sconce. Marty is wearing a black cape with red lining, a black tux, a white shirt with a white bow tie and a pendant on a red ribbon. He is standing behind a podium.)
This has been my entry for this weeks LJ Idol. I hope when the time comes you will vote for me. And if you know any bad vampire jokes, please feel free to post in comments. I miss them and Marty.
I had a friend who passed away last year by the name of Marty Gear. Marty was well known in convention costuming circles for a number of things including his beloved vampire Uncle Vlad who MC’d many a costume call. When things slowed down or there was need for filler, Uncle Vlad would always tell a joke and over the year, on purpose, these jokes got worse and worse. Marty collected bad vampire jokes like some people collect comics or baseball cards. He took great pride in his collection too.
The last time I saw him at a convention, he ran a bunch of new ones he had gathered up from when we last met. He knew that if he could get me to groan and roll my eyes, he had a serious winner. There would be a glint of glee in his eye when he knew he had one that would get me.
What does a Vampire call a squad of cheerleaders? A Happy Meal
He could also tell a shaggy dog story with the best of them. A shaggy dog story is a joke that takes a while to get to the punch line and usually the punch line is pretty groan inducing.
The skill that Marty had was when to tell these awful jokes for maximum effect. MCing a masquerade is hard. You have to keep it moving, keep the audience in a positive mood, and fill the gaps. The people who are better as it make it so the audience thinks, “well that was a fast masquerade” only to find out that they had been sitting there for two hours. When they are constantly looking at their watch, you know that you have a problem. Marty could take the “feel” of the audience pretty quickly and tailor his shtick accordingly. The more often he was the MC of a call, the easier it was for him. He knew what had worked and not worked the year before. It is a gift that many do not have.
I miss my friend. I miss being the test subject to some really groan inducing jokes. I miss watching him tell some of these jokes to a wider audience and getting a mix of laughter and groans. I miss the mastery he had of MCing a contest.
Good night Uncle Vlad.
Marty Gear as Uncle Vlad
(For the VI: This is a picture of Marty in his full vampire get up. Behind him is a doorframe with some cobwebs on it to the right of the doorframe is a large wall sconce. Marty is wearing a black cape with red lining, a black tux, a white shirt with a white bow tie and a pendant on a red ribbon. He is standing behind a podium.)
This has been my entry for this weeks LJ Idol. I hope when the time comes you will vote for me. And if you know any bad vampire jokes, please feel free to post in comments. I miss them and Marty.
