Peter David my husband

[puppetmaker]

 Eulogy-noun

Plural eulogies.

1.    a speech or writing in praise of a person or thing, especially a set oration in honor of a deceased person.

2.    high praise or commendation.

Peter didn’t like tomatoes at all, but he liked ketchup a lot.

Peter and I met at one of the last Atlanta Fantasy Faires. He bought a puppet which came with a thirty-minute lesson on how to operate it. The con committee told me that Peter had bought a puppet and wanted the lesson that came with it. I was on a time crunch because I had a show to stage manage that evening. Late afternoon found me behind his table teaching him and his daughter Shana how to operate a hand and rod puppet. I was focused on the lesson not all the things he was signing. He had a line for most of the time he was there but managed to find some time so I could show him what to do. I made sure Shana, who has a knack for it, knew what to do. I ran off to do my show. After the show and going out for a drink with the gang, I came home very sleepy. As I was getting ready for bed, I looked at my bookshelves and there at the top of the stack was Q-in-Law by Peter David. I slapped my head and said, “Oh THAT Peter David.”

After that we were convention buddies. We would catch up on each other’s lives and families and then move onto another topic that interested us. Then we started talking on AOL messenger and found we had feelings for one and other.

Peter and I official got together in 1998. I moved up to his neck of the woods as Atlanta had nothing that paid well for me to do. 

Since we had spent so much time talking on AOL, we knew each other better than we would have. When we got together it just felt right and as the years pasted even more right that we were together. 

I miss some of the insane conversations we had that went from point A to point M eventually getting back to point B. We could talk about everything under the sun. Yes, he was as funny as he was at conventions.

Conventions were where PETER DAVID attended. He seemed larger than life. He always loved talking to the fans. He said more than once, “Writing is a solitary profession. You write and hope other people will like what you right.” At conventions were the fans wanting to talk to him and tell him what he wrote that meant a lot to them. 

I remember one young man, who found out much later in life he was dyslexic, saying the Starfleet Academy books taught him to read and made him want to read. Other people have used the vows in Imzadi for their weddings. Everyone had a favorite story or series, and Peter would talk to them about it and answer questions the fans had. Sometimes it was something he came up with on the spot. 

His ability to make gay characters just another human being was magical. He was a strong supporter of the LBGTQ+ community as am I. My daughter is a lesbian with a wonderful partner. They support each other through all kinds of situations. Peter was very proud of what she has accomplished. He was very proud of all his daughters achievement of which there are many.

Peter is complimented how he wrote women who sounded like real women. He has gone on record that he feels there is no difference between the genders. He wrote them as human beings with their own faults and foibles along with their strength of character and the ability to rise to the occasion.

I have the good luck of being his first reader. I would give him my honest opinion as to what worked and didn’t work for me. Some suggestions he would take, some he would clarify, and others he left alone. He appreciated the input.

He would find ideas for writing in the strangest of places. We would be driving along and he would say, “What do you think of this idea for a story?” We would discuss it and either the idea was abandoned, or he would get home and hop onto the computer.

He liked cats. It wasn’t that he disliked dogs, he just preferred cats. And they liked him. He is survived by Fig, Inky, Mew, and Phoebe.

Peter encouraged me to build puppets. He would push me to work on puppets because he believed in me and my skill. He also trusted my ability to make costumes. Sometimes he didn’t give me much time to create what he came up with. That was Okay because I love a challenge. There were many a costume that was finished at the convention. He believed in my ability to write and encourage me to do so. We wrote a Ghostbusters comic entitled “What the Samhain is going on here”. I wrote it and Peter cleaned it up for me. Since then, I have been writing short stories for various anthologies. Sometimes under an alias. 

Peter is my soulmate. I am not saying we didn’t have disagreements, we did but we worked through them. We learned about each other to the point we could say half a sentence and the other would be filling in the next. We were very comfortable with each other. No need to put up masks.

I have drug resistant depression along with situational depression (I think you can guess the situation). Peter helped me get help so I could be me again not the sad rage monster I had become. I hope after I get everything done, I will no longer have situational depression. But there is a lot to do.

Peter will be remembered by many people for many things. I will remember my steadfast husband who was always in my corner and helped me become a better person.

What do you remember about Peter?

Comments

[senmut]

I never had the luck to meet him (or you!) in person. But my favorite memory when I was with my first adult family was this conversation:

"So you mean Peter David the Star Trek writer?"

"No, I mean Peter David the comic book writer."

I think that was when we were discussing if we could afford for all of us to go to a 'con he was scheduled for way back when. Pretty sure the kids' late dad did meet him once or twice.

I want to give a rousing cheer to his adept handling of teenaged heroes, because I know a LOT of people a bit younger than me found courage and strength to grow into the adults they wanted to be from reading his works.

May you always find joy in the memories made.

[dewline]

I remember reading his work back when he started with Spectacular Spider-Man. Once I started getting regular access to the Net via NCF, particularly Usenet, that was when I started interacting with Peter. We met in person maybe two or three times over the decades at conventions, and shared a restaurant table during one of them. I think it would have been my second San Diego trip in 2002, but I can't be sure. I was so pre-occupied with my father's health at that point because my Dad had had a cancer-induced stroke seeing me off at the airport at the Ottawa end of things.

I remember enjoying a lot of what Peter wrote over the decades.

Trying to remember more.

I'm sorry for this loss.

[wonderbink]

I remember the time he came down to Chattacon with you and what a relief it was for him to not be a guest. It was pretty early on in your relationship, as I recall, and my assessment of him was "I like this guy." Prior to Peter, the men in your life had been a bit...lacking. Peter had so many things going for him. He was a writer in many mediums. He told good stories, not just in the sense that he'd had an interesting life to talk about, but that he knew how to make things compelling, when to withhold information and when to reveal it. (He was a professional storyteller, so that shouldn't be all that surprising.) He was genuinely funny. He was protective of his own. He called me out on some bad behavior, which I needed calling out on, and warned me of severe consequences if I continued to do it. (We can talk about it in private if you don't already know what I'm talking about.)