puppetmaker (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
puppetmaker) wrote2012-05-03 11:55 am
puppetmaker) wrote2012-05-03 11:55 am
Entry tags:
Introspection: When It Just Isn't Enough
There are times in my life when I try my hardest and do everything that I need to do and it is not enough. Those are probably some of the most frustrating times for me.
When things happen that are totally out of my control it can be very maddening.
I am a pretty trusting individual. I tend to take people at face value and let their actions inform me of the kind of person they are. For me actions speak louder than words and have done so for many years. I know Peter loves me because not only does he say it to me but he does things for me and takes care of things for me which show me how much he does love me. He knows me very well and I know him very well.
To lose my trust takes quite a bit since I tend to be a benefit of the doubt kind of person as well, but it has happened in the past. And once my trust is lost, it can be hard to get it back but not impossible. I do believe that people can change.
I learned the hard way that not everyone on the planet is going to be one’s friend or even friendly, but there are ways to work with them on a professional level even if one doesn’t think much of them on a personal level. There are also those people who may be screaming for something that was done but the reason they are screaming has nothing to do with that but something else entirely.
I learned to admit my mistakes. If I screw up I will own up to it rather than trying to deflect the blame/disappointment. That was another hard lesson to learn but it made it easier when someone was yelling at me and I knew it was not my fault and they knew it too but they needed to yell.
I have been a little frustrated recently at several things that are going on around me. None of which I have any real control over so I get to sit on the sidelines and hope that everything shakes down soon. I really get angry at myself when I can’t figure out how I can help but I can also realize when anything I try to do is going to make things worse.
And I am a little frustrated with myself. I have been letting things get to me that shouldn’t be of any worry to me and that has led to my not doing some other things I probably should be doing. I am falling behind on some stuff I wanted to do and a couple of deadlines are seriously looming over my head. So I need to kind of clear everything thing out that I can’t change and work with what I can. And, of course, the wisdom to know the difference.
I am grateful for situations that change for the better.
When things happen that are totally out of my control it can be very maddening.
I am a pretty trusting individual. I tend to take people at face value and let their actions inform me of the kind of person they are. For me actions speak louder than words and have done so for many years. I know Peter loves me because not only does he say it to me but he does things for me and takes care of things for me which show me how much he does love me. He knows me very well and I know him very well.
To lose my trust takes quite a bit since I tend to be a benefit of the doubt kind of person as well, but it has happened in the past. And once my trust is lost, it can be hard to get it back but not impossible. I do believe that people can change.
I learned the hard way that not everyone on the planet is going to be one’s friend or even friendly, but there are ways to work with them on a professional level even if one doesn’t think much of them on a personal level. There are also those people who may be screaming for something that was done but the reason they are screaming has nothing to do with that but something else entirely.
I learned to admit my mistakes. If I screw up I will own up to it rather than trying to deflect the blame/disappointment. That was another hard lesson to learn but it made it easier when someone was yelling at me and I knew it was not my fault and they knew it too but they needed to yell.
I have been a little frustrated recently at several things that are going on around me. None of which I have any real control over so I get to sit on the sidelines and hope that everything shakes down soon. I really get angry at myself when I can’t figure out how I can help but I can also realize when anything I try to do is going to make things worse.
And I am a little frustrated with myself. I have been letting things get to me that shouldn’t be of any worry to me and that has led to my not doing some other things I probably should be doing. I am falling behind on some stuff I wanted to do and a couple of deadlines are seriously looming over my head. So I need to kind of clear everything thing out that I can’t change and work with what I can. And, of course, the wisdom to know the difference.
I am grateful for situations that change for the better.
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