Smile
(Just a heads up. I am probably not at my best. I am running on about three hours sleep due to a variety of reasons but this won’t leave my head)
Yesterday Caroline needed to get some materials for her still life project into the Art Room, which was locked. She went to an adult and asked for help. The adult knew her and that she was an art student so her wish to put a bag in the room was not unusual. They agreed to help her but she needed to do something for them and then they asked her to smile. Caroline did so but was not happy about the whole exchange.
“I am not unhappy but everyone keeps asking me to smile,” she said, “I find that annoying.”
I can sympathize with her because this is something I have heard most of my life too.
“If you smile, you would look prettier.”
“It takes more muscles to smile than to frown.”
“Why do you look mad all the time? You know if you smiled once and a while, you would look less harsh.”
“Smile, you have so much going for you.” Or “What do you have to frown about?”
“Why so serious?” (Yes even before Batman I heard this often).
I have what my sister in law called Resting Bitch Face as does she as does Caroline. We even have a card she created to explain why we are not smiling all the time. Caroline needs to laminate hers because she has used it so often.
I am not sad or angry or mad. This is just how my face looks. I have a severe face. It doesn’t mean that I am less happy than the person next to me just that my face seems to be in perma-frown.
I have used it to my advantage because it tends to cut through the bull crap pretty fast and they can tell I am not buying what they are selling.
If you want to know what I am really feeling, it is in my eyes not my mouth. Always have been. Peter knows this. He looks into my eyes and sees me with all my emotions. It is one of the many reasons I love him.
When I am forced to smile, it tends to be a death-head grimace rather than any true feeling. And you wonder why I tend to stay out of photos.
The upside is that when I do smile or laugh, it is totally honest. I have never been able to fake a laugh or a giggle and my hat is off to those who can.
Forcing people to smile when they don’t feel like it doesn’t seem to have anything to do with them and more to do with those who are insisting on the smile. It makes them feel better in some strange way that I will probably never understand.
Caroline says that anytime someone says, “smile” to her, she flashes back on the end of the first season of Jessica Jones when Jessica dispatches the Purple Man who keeps insisting that she smile through out the season. I have to say that does make me honestly smile.
I am grateful for honest smiles.
Yesterday Caroline needed to get some materials for her still life project into the Art Room, which was locked. She went to an adult and asked for help. The adult knew her and that she was an art student so her wish to put a bag in the room was not unusual. They agreed to help her but she needed to do something for them and then they asked her to smile. Caroline did so but was not happy about the whole exchange.
“I am not unhappy but everyone keeps asking me to smile,” she said, “I find that annoying.”
I can sympathize with her because this is something I have heard most of my life too.
“If you smile, you would look prettier.”
“It takes more muscles to smile than to frown.”
“Why do you look mad all the time? You know if you smiled once and a while, you would look less harsh.”
“Smile, you have so much going for you.” Or “What do you have to frown about?”
“Why so serious?” (Yes even before Batman I heard this often).
I have what my sister in law called Resting Bitch Face as does she as does Caroline. We even have a card she created to explain why we are not smiling all the time. Caroline needs to laminate hers because she has used it so often.
I am not sad or angry or mad. This is just how my face looks. I have a severe face. It doesn’t mean that I am less happy than the person next to me just that my face seems to be in perma-frown.
I have used it to my advantage because it tends to cut through the bull crap pretty fast and they can tell I am not buying what they are selling.
If you want to know what I am really feeling, it is in my eyes not my mouth. Always have been. Peter knows this. He looks into my eyes and sees me with all my emotions. It is one of the many reasons I love him.
When I am forced to smile, it tends to be a death-head grimace rather than any true feeling. And you wonder why I tend to stay out of photos.
The upside is that when I do smile or laugh, it is totally honest. I have never been able to fake a laugh or a giggle and my hat is off to those who can.
Forcing people to smile when they don’t feel like it doesn’t seem to have anything to do with them and more to do with those who are insisting on the smile. It makes them feel better in some strange way that I will probably never understand.
Caroline says that anytime someone says, “smile” to her, she flashes back on the end of the first season of Jessica Jones when Jessica dispatches the Purple Man who keeps insisting that she smile through out the season. I have to say that does make me honestly smile.
I am grateful for honest smiles.